The stars of the reality show: Jon & Kate Plus 8 have been all over the tabloid media lately with rumors of them splitting up because one or both of them are engaging in extramarital affairs.

Now, the big question on my mind is – who in the world is that DESPERATE to want to date a man or woman with 8 kids? A woman with three small children might get a date –if she has a church hook up, really good credit and doesn’t mind eating at The Olive Garden. A woman with EIGHT [noisy] kids – three words: COSTCO SAMPLE STATION.

Have you seen the show? Jon Gosselin is not really any kind of great catch — unless poor little (miserable, sniveling, balding . . . ) White (???) man with EIGHT [disbombulating] kids have become The New Sexy (I’ll politely pass, thank you.) Donald Trump only has five and is a billionaire – but if he had EIGHT children – he’d pay more for a coffee date than Eliot Spitzer. Where do multi-birth parents find dates anyway? Parent-trapped-like-hell.com?

It’s been reported that Jon Gosselin is dating a school teacher. Of course he’s dating a school teacher. The only other person who would date a man with eight screaming little crumbsnatchers is a veterinarian. Don’t get me wrong, I love kids – I have two of my own. However, I don’t even want to be in the same ROOM with a man who is the father to 8 children much less go out with one. I would be sitting on that date with my knees slammed shut like a bear trap just looking at him – from the other end of the room. My first text to him would be: Y R U HERE?! You know there’s no point in getting anywhere with a guy with 8 kids, because that just puts you at the very END of the child support line.

Will somebody please get Kate Gosselin a Shoe to live in already?